Audrey A McGee

Soooo…. I totaled my car.

Back in 2024. I’m okay, everyone’s okay.

I’m honestly surprised at myself for having included this in my intern tips because I am still pretty sensitive about the subject. But I suppose it is for the best.

It was actually while I was working my internship that I crashed.

This happened during callbacks for a show where I was the casting intern — shadowing the director and being able to ask questions in the room, setting up the sides and running check-in, lots of good things.

I spent a lot of time with the director that afternoon prepping how the readings were going to go — who we would pair with whom, how we would handle the timeline for various actors that were arriving late or leaving early — and then instead of getting in the car to immediately drive to these callbacks which were being held at a different theatre, I went to the grocery store and got dinner.

For some long period of time, I blamed that fried chicken for making me crash my car.

I don’t remember why I didn’t feel the correct sense of urgency until I left and realized I was running late. The director was already in front of me, and I was scared I would be late to the auditions I was supposed to be setting up. I have run late to too many events in my life (thanks, ADHD time-blindness), and I felt that I could not handle the shame if I did it now.

Already freaking out, I got stuck in some start-and-stop traffic. I freaked out more and went to text my mom, trying to gain some sympathy from her so I’d feel better.

BANG!

Yeah, I don’t text while driving anymore.

As I said, we’re all fine. No one was injured except for whiplash, but my car was done for.

The main lesson I learned: better late than dead.

When I was terrified about what people would think of me being late — irresponsible, ill-prepared — it made me so scared that I endangered myself. I could have been seriously injured that night or hurt somebody else simply because I prioritized my reputation over my safety.

When I first texted my boss what happened, her first concern was me and my safety. Not a thought about the callbacks. A few people I knew at callbacks reached out to me, worried and asking if I was okay from the accident. Nobody chastised me or thought less of me. I was still ashamed, so intensely ashamed. But I can tell you now that this incident probably faded from everyone’s memories pretty quickly, and only remains fresh in mine.

Friend, if you struggle with ADHD or some other reason why you’re chronically late, you can’t do a darned thing about it in the moment. You have to remain safe and focus on the task at hand, which is driving. If you’re late, you’re late. Honestly, it’s not going to affect your entire life, as something as bad as a car crash might.

Reminder that when you are driving a car, you are maneuvering an enormous piece of machinery that could easily kill dozens of people. Do not freak out and don’t be distracted. Yes, sometimes it’s important to communicate even while you drive, but voice text without even touching the phone, or pull off to the side of the road before picking it up.

Something I had to tell myself that night was that I was worth more than the totaled car. If you need that reminder too, please take it from me — if you walked away from that wreckage alive, no one is thinking of anything else but you. You are worth more than all the property damage in the world.

Your life is of immeasurable value. Your career is only a small glimpse of that. And people’s opinions about you don’t matter more than watching where you’re driving.